It seems so simple to think back to how for family life was growing up to determine how you will be as a parent. You may find you want to be just like your parents or maybe the complete opposite. It turns out it can be a bit more complicated than that.
There about a million daily decisions to be made each day on how to be a parent. There are situations you may have experienced and some you have not.
There are constant decisions that need to be made. Split second decisions at some points in the journey.
Each and every decision you make as a parent will have an impact on how your children grow and learn to be adults. This can feel like so much pressure!
I look back at the long run of my childhood and how my parents worked through their decisions and reactions to all the things that were going on. This helps me breathe a little easier. Any turmoil I ever felt as a child, or really as a teenager, is now easily dismissed as an adult looking back.
After reading through Why I Didn’t Rebel by Rebecca Gregorie Lindenbach and it was like the lullaby my Momma heart was so in need of. In this book Rebecca walks through some of her younger years as well as some research she has done in speaking with people that have fallen on either side of the rebelling line.
As she walks through why some rebelled and others didn’t she shares into the relationships that each had with their parents. When I look back at the relationship I had with my parents as a teenager and the safe zone of communication, I realize that is the heart of what I am trying to create.
In all my struggles with the 3 year old back seat driver warning me of the upcoming stop sign, or the onslaught of non stop questions, I try to hold my frustrations. I know that there are times that I have lost my battle and take quick actions that may cause tears, for both of us. But every time we talk it out. I know he doesn’t understand all my words just yet but we still talk it out.
You see what I realized in reading through Why I Didn’t Rebel is that I have to keep trying and keep doing. I cannot ever give up on trying to reach my kids, because my parents never gave up on me.
If you are feeling like you are struggling with how to raise your kids in a way that they won’t rebel and they will become great citizens of the world, just keep trying.