This morning when I finished my workout I was feeling pretty good and motivated, I had felt that I could see a difference this morning. I even got up on the scale and saw a (albeit small) decrease in numbers. I was ecstatic. Finally feeling the change was on the way. Then my stomach growled, loudly…I may have worked myself right to starvation the way it sounded. No worries I had a yogurt in my bag to have when I got to work and even had a granola bar to eat on the way if need be.
As I finished getting ready, it hit me, Dunkin Donuts was just across the street. I had time before work. I could easily just jump across the street before heading to work. This would be great.
WAIT!! STOP, I have worked so hard to get progress to start, I can’t just stop and grab something, that could quickly undo my progress.
Ok, back on track heading to work.
Then my vehicle reminded me that I needed to get gas soon, the light had gone off on my way into the gym. The gas station closest, just across the street…with a Dunkin Donuts. OH NO! Not again.
In a quick decision before my mind had a chance to really weigh what my options were I quickly turned to the right, away from the gas station and away from the Dunkin Donuts.
Now I still need to get gas on my way home but I am never tempted to grab anything on my way home so I will be ok.
Why is this such a big deal? One breakfast sandwich really shouldn’t make a difference right. Well it isn’t the one sandwich, or the one drink, or even the one time stop at all. The problem really is in the use of those conveniences available. In order to go to Dunkin Donuts it would make the most sense to load the gift card to use the app so that I could get points towards a free drink. The minimum amount is $10 to be able to add to the card. Again doesn’t appear to be harmful. If you are thinking that, you are not seeing it yet.
Patterns and conveniences can quickly spiral out of control on not only the meal planning that has been worked up but also the budget. Sure I add $10 today but then in a few days (maybe even a bit longer if I am really good) I remember I have some left over and I could stop for something, but I don’t have quite enough left, I will just add a bit more, right. Now I have quickly turned one stop to at least three.
You see the pattern going on now right?
Yeah, I have been there before. I had to remind myself of the goals I was aiming for. The reasons why I wanted to just head straight to work and not stop for the breakfast sandwich I really did not need.
It is so much easier to think in the ‘right now’ the ‘today’, maybe even in the ‘this week’. This was the type of thinking that I am striving to get away from. Planning is really the easier task. Having everything already laid out and no decisions to make for the ‘right now’ is the truly easier choice.
I started down this path to do something for me. It is so easy to get wrapped up in what my kids need, what my husband needs. I forget about myself. What I have found is that I am really getting so much to give back to them now too. I have more energy to play with the boys after work. I am more apt to go out to do something. I have implemented a night routine that has saved time in the morning. I am getting more sleep.
Did you get that last part? MORE SLEEP!
I cannot risk my old patterns coming back. I am not strong enough yet to have that one stop. I am proud of myself for seeing that I had to just keep driving.